happy birthday to a little girl who is missed.

Today, I am thinking of the little girl who we fostered for that short time a couple months ago. Today is her birthday and it’s a day I had hoped at one point that we could be there for, where we could throw her a party and shower her with love and gifts and make her feel loved.

I don’t know where she is, or who she is with, or what’s going on with her but I pray that she is healthy, happy, and safe… and I hope she is having a wonderful birthday and I hope she feels loved.

Happy birthday, O!

 

We love you!

saying goodbye.

After a long week as parents of three younguns, Carl and I said good-bye to “O” today as we dropped her off to be picked up by another family friend. I didn’t want to. I really, really didn’t want to. My heart has been heavy all day long and I keep wishing she was around to follow me all over the house going, “Mom! Mom! Mom! Whatsa doin? Whatsa doin?” all day long.

We knew that it wouldn’t be forever. It was only ever meant to be temporary. We said goodbye a little sooner than we expected for a multitude of reasons.

Please pray for “O” as she settles into her new home… pray that soon there is stability for her, that she will be happy and healthy and safe where she is.

I sure am gonna miss her.

just a small update

People have been asking, so here’s a small little update to let you know how things are going with O.

We are acclimating to this new adventure as well as we can. We were certainly not prepared to do something like this at this time, but it’s happened and what more can we do but roll with it? We’ve had a lot of outreach and out-pourings of love from those around us and those who aren’t around us physically, and we are so thankful for that. You guys are seriously amazing. I’m so thankful for your love and support and really if it weren’t for such loving, kind friends to encourage us, I don’t know how I’d have made it even this far.

Because this is very emotional. For a child to be taken from her mother, it has to be serious, and this is definitely serious. It is heartbreaking to witness this first-hand, and to have to have an inside look at something so sad. I don’t think I will ever know 100% what it is like to be a foster parent, to take on that role for many different children who could stay for a day or months, but so far we have been given the opportunity to experience it to some degree.

It gives me newfound respect for those who willingly choose this, who go through all the preparation and the home inspections and wake up in the middle of the night as a new child is brought to their door. It takes strong people. It takes people with big hearts ready to love a child who could leave at any moment.

To really get a feel for the life of a foster family, I encourage you to check out my friend Meghan’s blog (that’s a link). It’s been so helpful to me this past week. It’s encouraging and touching and moving, sometimes heartbreaking, a love-driven journey.

In terms of how O is doing… she’s having a lot of fun playing with all the toys here. She is a polite little girl who is so very sweet and likes to help. You can tell, though, she’s never really had much stability. Hopefully this short time she’s with us will be a good time for her, though.

We only really have trouble when she doesn’t get her way, but that’s kind of the same with most children, isn’t it?

Anyway, that’s all I can really do in terms of updating right now. There’s more going on, but right now I don’t really feel like talking about it just yet. Please continue praying for us all!

& Now for something completely different…

Carl and I have once more embarked on a new and different adventure in parenting, and no, this is not a pregnancy announcement.

Because a situation arose that needed immediate care, Carl and I have become voluntary foster parents. A woman who had been visiting the congregation for a while now got into a serious situation in which her daughter, who will be 3 in November, had to be removed from the living situation. To avoid her going directly into the “System”, of which I know absolutely nothing, her mother named us to DHR to see if we would be willing to take the girl (we’ll call her O for privacy issues).

It happened Monday afternoon. Clara and I were hanging out in the living room while Carl and Benjamin ran to get groceries at Wal-Mart when there came a knock on the kitchen door. Can you imagine my shock when I open up to a police officer? Once the DHR case worker came up and explained the situation, and asked if we’d be willing to take temporary physical custody of the girl, I could not say no.

We couldn’t get ahold of Carl during this time because there is no service in Wal-Mart (which is absolutely irritating). so here I am at my dining room table with a tearful mother, a cop, and a DHR case worker going over details. I sent him a text message: “You need to come home NOW” and after a bit, he called that he was on his way home and I explained very briefly, “DHR is here with O…”

Later I apologized to Carl because I hadn’t waited for him to say that we would, but he felt  the same way that I did. She needed a good home immediately and we had one.

We don’t know how long she’ll be with us. Because the situation is a serious one, it could be quite a long time. Because we don’t have unlimited finances, and because we already have Benjamin and Clara, we may not be able to keep her here for as long as she is away from her mother. But for right now, she is here with us and she is being taken care of.

I’m now asking you all to please pray with us. Carl and I have not had any sort of training in this area. We’ve never taken any fostering classes. We had no idea what to expect at all. Of course, we have been parents for nearly five years, and that’s the experience we can claim, but this is different.

But I don’t think anything could prepare anyone for the hour and a half spent trying to soothe a sobbing toddler who is crying that she wants her mommy.

I have never felt so heartbroken in my life.

And, I have never felt so humbled by the love and support that our friends and family have shown us as we embark on this new and challenging journey. We truly love each and every one of you. For those who have reached out in whatever way already, thank you, from the bottom of our hearts, thank you.

Please, please pray for all of us in this situation.

Benjamin and O during Bible time.