Ready.

I went outside to spend some time by myself, to talk to God and to refocus. I had been feeling really bummed out this week so far and it is not something I am used to being like and I didn’t like it. I’m just not a depressed/depressing person. So feeling like this really knocked me down. The devil I am sure was getting to me. Making me doubt and worry.

Spending that quality time with God, giving Him my worries, letting Him know how I was feeling… it helped. Have you ever just sat down and just spilled your heart out before God? I had a good phone conversation last week with one of my dearest and best friends Kara and we talked about this. It is so rare that I ever get a chance in my daily life to really pour my heart out to God – and I need it! I need to do this more often and I am sure I wouldn’t get into such a funk as I was yesterday.

After really laying all my cards on the table, I realized something. Maybe what I was worried about all this time is whether or not I’m ready. Am I ready to move so far away from all my friends and family? Am I really ready to get back in the game after being so burnt the first time? You know all this time I have been feeling like being the “benchwarmer” (I don’t mean this as in my relationship with God or Christ so please don’t take it this way), and kind of hoping that God would just let us stay on the bench a little longer before putting us back out on the field.

It doesn’t work that way. God is calling the shots here. I need to stop worrying about when I think I’m ready. I need to think more about when God thinks I am ready.

Guess what?

I’m ready.

I am so ready to be a part of God’s plan. I am so ready for a clean slate, for a new place to live, for new friends and new possibilities. I’m ready to experience new things and learn and grow. I’m ready to be useful where God needs me. I’m ready to follow my husband wherever he feels is best for our family. I’m ready to Skype my parents and I’m ready to decorate and entertain in a new house. A fresh start.

I needed a change of attitude this week. A better way to look at things. Instead of looking at the negative, like not knowing when I’ll see my family and friends again, I needed to look at the positive and all the possibilities out there for me and for my family. It’s a chance to grow where I may not have ever had a chance to grow had we not given our lives to the Ministry. A chance to experience more. A chance to make more connections and friendships and bonds.

A chance to expand our family (in the future – this is by no means any sort of announcement HA!), a chance to grow as a family.

I’m ready. God already knew this. Sometimes it just takes me a while to catch on.

Counting On.

Benjamin has been learning how to count.

He can pretty much count to ten now.

What is more important to us, though, is teaching him WHO to count on.

“Casting all your care upon Him; for He careth for you.”
1 Peter 5:7

I hope that you know who you can count on, too.

I love you all!

Oh, how GREAT!

Well, it’s certainly Fall in Georgia! We went from a week of 50’s weather back to a week of 70’s. This kinda switch really messes with your sinuses, that’s for sure! Benjamin has a runny nose now. Of course, I am not concerned about it. A runny nose is a runny nose. No big deal.

I guess one thing that I don’t mind about the weather is the fact that we are able to play outside again without fear of getting too cold and having to come back in. However, when the sun beats down on you in the middle of the day, it sure can get hot! Oh, fickle Georgia… why must you mess with us so?

We were able to go to the park with Benjamin’s uncle Preston the other day! We hadn’t seen him in a while so it was a lot of fun hanging out and playing at the park. They went down the slide (Benjamin got a head start) and we all had swinging competitions. Preston and Carl both beat me but I am not ashamed to say that I totally beat Benjamin in the swinging competition. I may or may not have celebrated this feat. Okay, I did. To make myself feel better.

There was a dam and a waterfall and stream there… as well as a dead deer but we’re going to skip over that part. There were also yellow jackets, and Preston can tell you that they are not ashamed to fly down your shirt and when they bite, they BITE! I may or may not have jumped out of the car and run across the parkinglot when one got in the car with us. Okay, I did. So?

(He likes to show off his belly)

It was such a nice day. I want to go back sometime soon.

I’m feeling really good this week. Less desperate, I guess. More hopeful. God is good.

“Oh how great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men!”
Psalm 31:19

Leap! Part Two.

Not too long ago, I wrote a blog about our decision to pause in our search for a preaching job, wanting to settle down around here and get a secular job instead. It was all about taking that leap of faith, and I explained that I see it like this: taking a leap of faith and trusting that God is there to catch us.

This time, it seems that in mid-leap, God is reminding us that He is the One in control. He will lead us where He wants us, and He is the One opening doors, not us. We were very ready to take a break from the preaching life because we hadn’t been able to find a job and because we thought things were looking up for us in taking a secular job instead, but as soon as we thought that the secular job would work out for us, it didn’t. Right now we are still jobless and living off about just enough to get us through the rest of the year, plus our parents’ gracious help.

I was really feeling sorry for myself and feeling hopeless and helpless.

And then the door opened again, and we decided that we are not going to ignore it. If God wants us somewhere, I believe He will make it clear to us that He does. Not miraculously, but providentially. The door has opened again, and this time it is not secular. We’re thinking that maybe what God wants from us is that we trust Him completely, that He will be with us through our troubles and He will provide what we need. He also has promised this to everyone out there (“Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33) as long as we are willing to put aside what WE want and desire and go after what HE wants. So maybe this place where He has opened up the door for us NEEDS us as well, and God is answering them along with us!

Isn’t it amazing that we all might play a bigger part in the grand scheme of things than we possibly realize? Have you ever wondered whose life you’ve been placed in for a bigger purpose than just to know someone? Have you ever wondered if you’re on the other side of the door that God is opening up for someone? So maybe we’re not the only ones leaping here.

Every day after Chapel, the Memphis School of Preaching students sing one song in particular. It’s the same song every day. In fact, the wives sing it too at the end of their chapel before they go to wives’ class. Carl led it the other day at Worship and it was a great reminder to me.

I know the Lord will make a way for me.
I know the Lord will make a way for me.
If I walk in heaven’s light,
Shun the wrong, and do the right,
I know the Lord will make a way for me.

God is making our way. HE is in control. We’re going to leap through that door as soon as it is opened for us and we are going to do the best we can!

I’m pretty excited.

And I always appreciate your comments and your encouragement. My friends have been very precious to me during this time. You are all wonderful. Oh, speaking of friends, I have one more thing:

I posted this on facebook, but in case any of you wished to join in, I wanted to post it here. If you’d like to join in, just leave a comment and make sure you put your email in the comment so I can email you all the stuff you need to know, like what book we’re studying and all that.

Hello ladies! I have been searching for new ways to bring us all closer to God through this simply wonderful tool we have here - the internet! I have been thinking the past few days about how we might be able to do this. I have tried a study on my blog which went well for a while and they I think kinda dropped off (mostly my fault, and I do apologize for that! I am working to get that back up and at least finish the Proverbs 31 woman). Anyway, I was wondering who all might be interested in doing a book club with me?

I was thinking we could all choose a book to study (a women's study book would be great) and set a goal for how much to study of the book during the week and by a certain date have it all done. We can create a group here on facebook to discuss the book (as I think that would probably be easiest). OR -- and I just figured this out, we could all register onwww.shelfari.com and create a book group there, and also add books to our own shelves with books we would like to study. We can do both, if you wanted. I at least thought that shelfari would be a great way to browse book recommendations and everything.

Anyway, if you wanted to check out my current shelf that I compiled for this purpose, you can see it here:

http://www.shelfari.com/o1514146643/shelf

So, who all is with me? Of course, you'd have to supply your own book once we chose one. I'll get around to tagging later when I have more time in case people don't see this. <3

Lemme know who is interested, and also what books you'd like to study.

I hope you all are having a great week!

all excited up in here!

Well, hello November! I can’t believe we are in the next-to-the-last month of the year! It’s incredible how this year has just flown by. I don’t know how I feel about this, especially since my baby turns two in January. Let’s not talk about that right now… let’s talk about…

TRICK – OR – TREATING!

Okay, so, going up to doors and knocking, and then asking nicely for some candy to put in your plastic pumpkin bucket was totally a hit with Benjamin. At first he wasn’t so sure about it. We took him over to his Great-Grandma’s first so she could see him in costume (she lives in the subdivision across the main road from ours). He was a little iffy at first and unsure what he was supposed to do, but when the door opened and the candy came out, he was all over that situation! She allowed him to choose as many candies as he wanted (he actually put some back) and he just had a ball putting them in his bucket.

After that, we went on home to get the rest of our stuff for Trick or Treating. I left my camera at home because I preferred experiencing it with him instead of being the mommy with the camera attached to her face. It was a good Halloween costume for me, because we all know I have that thing around the clock. Ha!

Benjamin really enjoyed trick or treating! Everyone thought he was just a precious little puppy and he was so polite to everyone, even at the two houses that scared him. There was one I knew would be scary because they always go all out with decorations and he was fine until a witch started cackling at him. He started screaming but managed to say “AH DOOOO!” (Thank you) as we left. Carl and I miiiiiiight have laughed about that all the way down the street. Okay, we did.

We didn’t do the entire neighborhood because the street was getting crowded, and, after all, Benjamin didn’t need all that candy in the first place. So we went back home and Benjamin started helping Nana open up the door and handing out candy to the other trick or treaters. I don’t know which Benjamin enjoyed more: going trick or treating or handing out the candy.

Anyway, that was Saturday night. We really didn’t celebrate on Sunday because it is the Lord’s Day.

I hope everyone else had a safe Halloween if you celebrate it! Tomorrow happens to be SOMEone’s birthday (cough, cough, COUGH), and that SOMEone is actually pretty stoked about it because she – ahem, THEY (to keep the anonymity going) got a coupon in their email for a free entree at Moe’s, and that just so happened to be one of the birthday dinner choices! Yep, the coupon sealed the deal!

So yeah. That person is going to be 22. Woohoo! And that person is all excited up in here.

getting ready for Halloween.

Yesterday, Benjamin “helped” his daddy carve his first pumpkin.

 

He didn’t much like the goopy stuff.

But he did like the turnout of his Mickey Mouse pumpkin.

We went to an Animation Festival at some friends’ house. Benjamin really liked it.

We watched old cartoons outside!

But Benjamin liked looking at the pumpkins all lit up the best.

And tonight is Trick or Treat.

Seeking.

     Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you. –          Matthew 6:33

Lately during Bible class and in sermons, William, the preacher at New Hope Road has been really hitting on the subject of seeking first the kingdom and what this means. He has said at least twice now that if you are truly seeking first the kingdom, it should be no question as to where you are going to be on Sunday – you already know that you are going to be at Bible Class and Worship services. It isn’t a question of “Am I going to church this morning?” – your Sundays are taken every week of the year, unless there is an actual legitimate reason as to why you can’t be there.

Side note: I personally think that we even take that a bit far. We say, “Oh, I feel a little headache coming on, I better stay home…” – let me tell you something. We have a very old couple at our congregation. The wife is completely mute because she had a stroke years ago, and the husband has to use a walker to make it around because of horrible leg problems. Every time I ask him how he is doing, he says he is not doing well at all. And yet, they are both there as often as they can. And we use any and every excuse to not be there. In foreign countries, everyone from the smallest to the oldest will walk miles just to get to a place where the Saints are meeting! It doesn’t take much effort for us to make it, and yet we don’t even attempt sometimes to make that effort!! This is shameful.

Wanna know the most legitimate reason why we sometimes miss services (on a regular basis especially)? Satan. I know that may be a bit harsh to say, but Satan has a goal to keep us all as far away from God as possible, and if he can just get us to miss here and there and not think much of it, and then even do it regularly without much of a thought or any feeling of regret… he truly has succeeded! One less soul devoted to God. One less soul truly seeking God.

What does it mean to truly seek the kingdom of God and His righteousness? Or, maybe the question should be, “How?” Well think about it. The Bible tells us to seek God and His righteousness. Can it be that hard? It’s all in the Bible! I like the way the psalmist put it in Psalm 119:11:

     Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.

To seek God’s kingdom and righteousness, we need to hide His words, the words given to us in the Bible, in our hearts. It needs to be something that we keep with us and meditate on. It needs to be in the forefront of our minds and it needs to take precedence over all other things in our life. This is something that Carl and I are working very hard to instill in our son. We put a big stress on learning from and about the Bible and our Creator, and about Christ and His church. That comes first when we begin learning new things. We do learn the alphabet and our colors and shapes, but that is not what is most important to us.

     Therefore shall ye lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign
      upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes. And ye shall teach them your children, 
      speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest
      down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt write them upon the door posts of thine house, and upon
      thy gates: – Deuteronomy 11:18-20.

How do we seek after God’s kingdom and His righteousness? We make it our top priority. How do we make sure our children are seeking first God’s kingdom and His righteousness? Well first of all, we have to be doing so ourselves. We have to be making it our first priority. We need to be doing exactly as Deuteronomy 11:18-20 says to do. As parents, we have been entrusted with these little souls by God and it is our duty to protect these souls against the wiles of the devil by armoring them with the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18).

Just like William has been saying, if you are not devoting yourself to gathering with the saints on the day that has been put aside for that – Sunday, the Lord’s day – then you are obviously not seeking first the Kingdom. It’s not your first priority and it likely won’t be your children’s first priority, if or when you have children. It should never be the case that you wake up on Sunday morning and groan, “I have to go to church today…” – you should wake up in the morning on Sunday and say, “I get to worship God our Father with the brethren today!” It isn’t some burden that has been placed upon us. It isn’t punishment, and what’s more, if you’re seeking God’s kingdom and His righteousness, it isn’t optional. There should be no question in your mind. If you are seeking first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, you’re going to put forth that effort, and you’re going to do it joyfully!